Eve popped in to see how her mother was getting on with an old i-pad she had given her. Over a cup of tea Ann, her mother told her how much she was enjoying the internet and Facebook, catching up with old friends and making some new ones.
One man had seemed so nice, living in America and widowed like her. Eve eyed her mother as she chattered on. Apparently, he wanted to hang out. Ann asked him where he wanted to meet. He explained there was an app for a chat room. Not being sure she told him she was just happy to chat on Messenger.
‘What colour’s your hair?’ he asked.
‘Brown in summer and white in winter.’
‘Send a snap of u,’ he said.
Ann explained she didn’t have any, and didn’t hear anything for a few days.
Next thing a message came saying, ‘Show me your tits.’
‘I sent him a photo of both, Eve, as I didn’t know if he wanted a great tit or a blue tit.’
Eve spluttered in her tea, then noticed a twinkle in her mother’s eye.
‘Now, show me your bare…’
‘I quite like polar bears, Eve, so sent a photo of them.’
Again, a silence for a few days. Then he wrote:
‘No, you naked, lady.’
This time Eve gasped. ‘You didn’t?’
Ann smiled. ‘Your father never saw me naked, so why would I show a stranger. I sent him a photo of a naked statue.’
‘U stupid lady!’ came his reply.
‘My reply, Eve, was to send a photo of the rear end of a donkey. Strangely enough I haven’t heard from him since.’
It took some time for them both to stop laughing. One up to mother, Eve thought.
